Who's the champion?

I got promoted today! No. . . seriously I did!!!
(cue the applause)
I was really excited until I found out that it actually comes with more responsibility. - who knew?? Any of you who know me know that my ultimate plan is NOT to climb the corporate ladder, it's to get married and be a trophy wife, wear hot pants to the supermarket and take sissy classes at the gym! (That was a test, anyone who REALLY knows me knows I have uncharted lengths of sarcasm all stored up for a time like this).
Anyway, seriously I'm super excited and terrified at the same time. Failure is a scary thing. It's like I have those two versions of me sitting on my shoulders. One is a devil (and I look hot as a little devil) and the other is an angel who, let's be honest, looks exactly like how I always look, only on a smaller scale. The angel is all "Way to go!", "You're Super!", and other encouraging phrases that your 3rd grade teacher would buy on a sticker and put on your spelling paper. The devil is more "So...you fired yet or what?" ... reminds me much more of the high school teacher who used her "Big, Red Pen of Death" to write things like "SEE ME AFTER CLASS" and "I'M CALLING YOUR MOM". That pen still gives me nightmares....