Jerry Springer casting call

I know you're all on the edge of your seats waiting to hear how our weekend was. Let's go with "eventful". For a better understanding of our new life in the south, by all means continue reading.
Friday I went on a job hunt around the base... not very fruitful, but definitely entertaining. Apparently there really isn't much to be had in that area - although the local strip club is advertising the return of "Ladies' Oil Wresting". Yeah. I. Don't. Think. So. If I'm lucky I'll be pumping gas for you when you come visit us.
Friday evening we went out to eat with some of Rob's buddies. Very cool guys, good times. The only incident happened while we were outside waiting for our table. This 4- year old kid - who was waiting with his family- picked up a massive rock, launched it at Rob and hit him in the face. ::Pause:: yes. you read that correctly. The mom of said 4 year old actually giggled and led her son over to Rob to apologize, which he did not, (and neither did she) and then walked back to her group of giggling friends. The four of us were so stunned we didn't know what to do. All of you at home who are thinking of all the violent ways you would have reacted, please keep in mind that this area is like an open set of Jerry Springer. Any repremanding we might have done would just have been met with ignorance and possibly some bad language and hair pulling.
We had some more fun with sheer ignorance on Saturday at the local Wal-Mart. A woman pulled into the "20 Items or Less" lane with a shopping cart that looked like it had just come off the set of Supermarket Sweep. Over the next 10 minutes, we stood clutching our 4 ingredients for spaghetti and watched in amazement as she unloaded most of Wal-Mart onto the tiny counter. As she was finishing up, her husband came up (out of nowhere) with an armload of other materials they had overlooked and proceeded to stack them precariously in front of the cashier. Amazing.
I think we are in some kind of time warp down there. The next time you see us, if I am wearing dangerously short cut offs and Rob has on a T-shirt that says "I heart hot moms" (yes, we actually saw this) please PLEASE intervene.